The Petulant Petrel
Isn't this exactly what we do when we're feeling attacked? In our defensive response we go all “petrel” on our attacker, verbally vomiting our wrath right into their face. And if we're forceful enough perhaps, like the Petrel, we'll knock them down.
This is certainly crude, but is it the most effective way of dealing with human conflict?
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1). … ”A hot-tempered man stirs up dissension, but a patient man calms a quarrel” (Proverbs 15:18).
The Story of the Drowning Man
It is well documented that drowning doesn't always "look" like drowning. It is often silent and seemingly unremarkable. That's because of someing called The Instinctive Drowning Response.
The Instinctive Drowning Response - named by Francesco A. Pia, Ph.D. - is what people do to avoid actual or perceived suffocation in the water. And it does not look like most people would expect. There is very little splashing, no waving and no yelling or calls for help of any kind. To get an idea of just how quiet and undramatic from the surface drowning can be, consider this: It is the No. 2 cause of accidental death in children ages 15 and under (just behind vehicle accidents). What's more, of the approximately 750 children who will drown next year, about 375 of them will do so within 25 yards of a parent or other adult. In some of those drownings, the adult will actually watch them do it, having no idea it was happening. Drowning does not look like drowning.
But for those situations which are obvious enough to attract the attentiion of a potential resucuer, the act of rescue itself can be quite dangerous. According to the rescue experts at ProTraining.com,
Once a person shows signs of drowning, there is very little time left in which to rescue them. That said, do not jump into the water to save a drowning person unless you have been specifically trained to do so and you are certain that it is safe.
A person who is drowning will panic and grab onto anything they can — including an intended rescuer. The last thing you want is for them to drag you down under the water with them.
To that point, Watchman Nee once shared an incident about a man who was drowning in a river. There were several people standing by, but none of them knew how to swim, except for one strong swimmer. However, despite the drowning man's desperate cries for help, the swimmer did nothing but stand by the shore, watching the struggle. The crowd became anxious and started shouting at the swimmer, urging him to go and save the man.
After a few moments, when the drowning man was just about to go under and could no longer struggle, the swimmer finally jumped into the water and swiftly rescued him. Once the man was brought to safety, someone from the crowd angrily asked the swimmer why he waited so long to act.
The swimmer calmly explained, "If I had jumped in earlier, the man would have been thrashing around in his panic, and both of us could have drowned. I had to wait until he was exhausted and no longer trying to save himself. Only then could I rescue him without risking both our lives."
Watchman Nee used this story to illustrate a powerful spiritual lesson. In our relationship with God, we often rely too much on our own strength, effort, and wisdom to solve problems or overcome challenges. We try to take control of situations and work things out on our own. However, true faith requires us to surrender our self-effort and acknowledge our helplessness.
Only when we stop struggling and trying to save ourselves can God step in and work in our lives. Just like the swimmer had to wait for the drowning man to stop fighting, God often waits for us to come to the end of our own strength. It's only then, when we fully depend on Him, that His power can be made perfect in our weakness.
This story teaches the importance of letting go of our reliance on ourselves and learning to trust completely in God's ability to save, guide, and provide for us.
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong" (2 Corinthians 12:9-10, NIV).
Sorry I'm Late
An alcoholic friend of famed author and speaker Philip Yancey was once purported to have said:
When I'm late to church, people turn around and stare at me with frowns of disapproval. I get the clear message that I m not as responsible as they are.
But when I'm late to AA, the meeting comes to a halt and everyone jumps up to hug and welcome me. They realize that my lateness may be a sign that I almost didn t make it. When I show up, it proves that my desperate need for them won out over my desperate need for alcohol.
If AA can get this right, shouldn't we, as the Church, all the more get it right?
Let's focus on each other's victories, rather than shaming and guilting each other for our failures (whether real or presumed).
"Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works" and faithfulness, and perseverance, and obedience, and ... (Hebrews 10:24, NLT).
"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear" (Ephesians 4:29, ESV).