Speck Inspection
Most of us learn pretty early on that in a conflict, getting those feelings of hurt and disappointment out there is more likely to end a relationship than to fix it. But if honesty chases a friend or a partner away, isn't that for the best?
This would be a good time to remember that Jesus said that being honest with others about their faults is like focusing on a “speck” while ignoring the "log" in our own eye.
That's because when we see a fault in someone else, what we can't see is their true motive or what they've been through to cause them to behave that way. By contrast, we know all of these things about ourselves.
As a result, we are in a much better position to see and address our own faults. They are like a log compared to what we can see in someone else.
Because we are all sinful by nature, we operate from an egocentric perspective. The result is that our relationships suffer not so much from poor communication as from the wrong focus in our communication.
But what would happen if we approached relationship problems with a focus on fixing ourselves, first? What if we refused to address the specks in the eyes of others until we had thoroughly dealt with our dysfunctional behavior? Is it possible that others might be more open to what we have to say about their faults if we admitted our own and did something about them?
"You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye" (Matthew 7:5).
Go To Your Brother
Joseph Parker, a prominent British minister at the end of the 19th century, published an open letter to express his concerns for his friend and colleague, Charles Spurgeon. The letter read, "Let me advise you to widen the circle of which you are the center. You are surrounded by offerers of incense. They flatter your weakness, they laugh at your jokes, they feed you with compliments. My dear Spurgeon, you are too big a man for this."
Whether the concerns were valid or not, the method was certainly lacking. A true friend brings their concerns to us privately and only goes to our public with words of support and/or praise.
We would all do well to practice this same discretion in our social media interactions. Why correct a friend on a public facebook page when you can just as easily private message them? Show them you care more about them than winning an argument or looking superior.
"If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over" (Matthew 18:15).
Fishing For A Friend?
The Independent reports:
The fish friend programme caught the imagination of the internet after radio producer Michelle Cook tweeted a picture of the fishbowl and sign. The caption read: “My friend is staying in a hotel in Belgium. They've offered her the option of renting a fish for the night, in case she's lonely.”
... Hotel manager David Dillen told The Independent that the fish rental service has been running for several years and is popular with guests.
He said: “We started a few years ago. The idea was to surprise our guests, as we always try to do.
“It’s brilliant to see how people react to it. They smile, they take pictures to put on social media. We rent a few fish per week.”
There are a lot of ways to deal with the problem of loneliness. You could order a fish. Or, you could get out of yourself and focus on trying to help someone else. Whatever might be said of Jesus' followers, it should never be said that they are lonely. First, you’re never alone when you walk closely with Jesus. He is constantly by your side. Also, He compels you to seek and serve others—particularly the lost. His promise to every faithful follower is that He will make them fishers of men. So the next time you're feeling all alone, don't hang out with a fish, but go fishing!
"Come, follow Me," Jesus said, "and I will make you fishers of men" (Matthew 4:19).